Whether Every Tree’s Birthday Falls In the Spring
Geyujing Shen is a Chinese photographer who was born in Zhejiang Province. She graduated with an MA in Photography and Urban Cultures from the Goldsmiths College, University of London. We present Geyujing’s project, Whether Every Tree’s Birthday Falls In the Spring, in which she raises awareness about queer Chinese female community in London through the prism of personal experience living in another country. The attention is drawn to the topics of loneliness, the importance of community, as the glue holding people together through shared values and aspirations, and the concept of belonging. As Geyujing explains, “I tried to explore the meaning of the homeland to this group, the weight of loneliness of living in a foreign country, and their anxieties about identity.”
The quest has to do with exploring one’s identity and deals with experiences of urban migration. Deeper angles and meanings are suggested, allowing to see beyond the personal to acknowledge collective memory. The research stems from a psychological prism, the individual experiences of various women involved, by learning about their hardships, and their attempt to redefine identity. The black and white images delve into the personal, the photographer’s story and vision through the poetic narrative that explores the infinity of nature and the tranquil imagery of trees and water elements. The color part of the project emphasizes the community of similar-minded queer Chinese female characters through portraits that represent their emotional state, the one of loneliness, contemplation, and the quest for connection, for building meaningful relationships in the unknown. The two parts are connected and suggest the building of a renewed identity, hinting on the possibility of hope coming through human connections.
Special thanks to Queer China UK The project is sponsored by Female Documentary Photography Foundation
‘The main subject of this project is diasporic young Chinese female queers who are based in London.’
The main subject of this project is diasporic young Chinese female queers who are based in London. The central idea was to find the answers to these questions: how do they place themselves in a foreign country? How do they reconnect with their gender identity in a new environment? How do they practice trusting, giving, and taking from others who are unfamiliar to them? How do they find themselves in a totally different culture and community? How do they look back on their experiences of growing up in China?
I tried to explore the meaning of the homeland to this group, the weight of loneliness of living in a foreign country, and their anxieties about identity. The narrative I’ve chosen for this project is a poetic narrative. I try to break away from time and flatness to connect on an emotional level with this group via indeterminate images inspired by personal experiences and collective memories.
‘Perhaps this subtle and fluid sense of distance can erase the differences between individuals, allowing us to discover the common burdens carried by this group and the dilemmas they are facing.’
Inspired by Chinese traditional poetic narratives, I attempted to construct a story with a subtle and non-linear narrative structure. I sidestepped the direct confrontation with the awkwardness and helplessness of facing pain by using metaphors, comparisons, and other techniques to hint at the wounds that Chinese female queers, living in the margins of multiple identities, find difficult to articulate but which continue to ache silently. This kind of narrative steered away from sharp propaganda and, instead, delved into the more concealed and delicate realm of personal memories. However, the project doesn't revolve around any specific individual or a few individuals; rather, by avoiding specifics and creating a sense of distance, it safeguards the subjects being photographed from the gaze of the viewers and protects the viewers from the sadness/depression of the subjects. Perhaps this subtle and fluid sense of distance can erase the differences between individuals, allowing us to discover the common burdens carried by this group and the dilemmas they are facing.
‘The chaotic tangle of grass reflected her complex thoughts and her life was still in an undecided stage. As she gazed in the direction of the setting sun, she seemed lost in her thoughts.’
I like this photo; I consider it the key image that represents the maturity and completeness of this project. This photo almost encompasses all the issues I hope to explore through this project. It was also the first time the subject wrote me a letter to share her identity journey and confusion, which made the interview more relaxed and informal compared to the usual structured interviews. It felt like catching up with an old friend.
The girl in the picture is named Gengen, and this photo was taken during our first meeting. It was on a sunny autumn afternoon. After receiving her letter, we decided to meet in a park near her home. We chatted and walked, and she confided in me about her struggles with identity and intimacy. She talked about her upbringing and her family, expressing her feeling of not quite fitting in with any particular group and occasional loneliness. Finally, she led me to this meadow, which is where she often relaxes. She told me about dating a boy and a girl here. In the distance, the outline of the city was faintly visible. At that time, she had been in London for over a year, trying her best to find her place in this new city. The chaotic tangle of grass reflected her complex thoughts and her life was still in an undecided stage. As she gazed in the direction of the setting sun, she seemed lost in her thoughts.
